"girlfriend" selfish during sex?

recently a long time friend has become more and we have graduated from grammar school kissing to college dorm foreplay. It has been all of two weeks and I often find myself fingering her without an inkling of reciprocation. she has never once reached for my restless appendage (wouldn't request oral, seems derogatory as I love her), and seems self absorbed after she's come. Should I navigate her hand during foreplay, or manifest the condom always available in my blue jeans? Thanks